Spring in Idaho. So fun with snow rain and more snow. Wanna build a snowman. So did chiropractor this morning. Learning that I’m not put on blood thinners because my blood clots are in superficial veins and not the main one. And that we are doing one leg first because once its flowing correctly it sometimes kicks starts the other to run better. Much better when someone explains what is going on.
Made lunch today. Had a craving for murdered veggie. Andiy came to help me eat it and get her new shirt and show one off.
Then it was on to cleaning my office some more. Just taking a break right now to write a post and add more stuff to ebay.
So flash back is a start of a story I was writing, I have no date for this but I would put it about 2000ish.
The fluorescent green light shone down on the gigantic empty table. I have tortured many on the table. Now it was time to do it to my final victim. His crimes I don’t know, but my job was just to steal all his memories. The thought of destroying this man’s life never would have hit, but he was familiar. I’ve met him before.
They laid the victim on the and strip him down to only his boxers. Then I slowly strap his ankles and his wrists with he large leather straps. One strap went across his muscular chest and another across his forehead.
His sky blue eyes stared into the bright light above. They sparkled from all the joy he has experienced, but now I was going to take that all away. His face showed no expression of fear, but of peace. He must of known what I was about to do to him, but he was calm, too calm.
I wired him and plugged it into the electricity. He’s heavenly look scared me. He was ready for his treatment and I wasn’t ready to give it to him.
My voice choked up in my throat but not a sound came out. How was I going to torture this boy when I had no courage to do so.
The room stated to feel hot and musty. I paced the dark corner of the room as the kid laid on the table. He barely moved and when he did it was only to loosen his stiffening body.
I had an urge to find out who this stranger was. I found the discarded clothes by the door. I searched every pocket until I found a scrape of paper. Neatly written in black ink was the letters N…I…C…K. I had a name.
I approached the table. “Is this you?” I asked showing the name to him.
He slowly smiles and a tear comes to his right eye. “Yes.”
“So what did you do to get here?” This question was always the first question I would ask someone, but I didn’t want to know his answer.
It came as a surprise to me. I wonder how could anyone be punish for a thing as little as this. My job seemed senseless. I didn’t need to wipe his mind clean but to free him.
I slowly tore off the straps that held him down, I pulled off the wires and threw him his clothes. I would loose my life for doing this last simple act of kindness, but I knew I must.
This life wasn’t for me to take, but for me to give another chance to live. His life was too great to destroy. Freedom was his right.
Easter?! The question that was asked all day. No mine wasn’t that awesome since I went to a funeral on Saturday. The funeral was good, but alas it is what it is. First day back to work after the fact and called in early, which is nice it’ll put my week above 30 hours which I need but I’m still drained emotionally and mentally. I don’t think I’ve grieved properly as of yet.
I have not found any new useful info on how to earn money online. Still looking but not finding anything of much use, at least nothing that would help me. Though right now my goal is to earn $2000, it’ll pay off one credit card. Really need $5000 to get me out of the loan that I took and so shouldn’t have. A big regret but if I can get out of one credit card it would help a lot. Tupperware
So blast from the past: 4-20-2000
With Summer leaving
And Fall Approaching.
A Final Time Has Come.
With a season Returning.
And school Beginning.
A new adventure has come.
Lost I’m Lost.
Can’t find my way home.
Where shall I go?
Who do I ask?
HELP, I’m lost.
Lost, I’m lost.
Can’t find my way home.
What am I to do?
How did I get here?
HELP, I’m Lost.
Can You HELP Me??
So tomorrow will be start of a story. Back in the day I would write poems and stories. Most stories never were finished but as I come across stuff I’ll share what I have. Also have stuff in here during a really hard time in my life and I just feel that I should post that stuff I wrote on here. Maybe it’ll hit home for some people. But take stuff lightly they are how I felt and screamed in my head and not meant to hurt anyone’s feelings.
To finish was a poem I wrote when Steve Irwin died and I feel it is rather appropriate since my grandma just recently passed on.
For All who passes on.
We appreciate all that you have done.
All that you have shown us.
All that you have taught us.
We’ve learned and grown
And found strength to do things that we thought impossible.
Your love has taught us o share ours
And to make this world better.
Your memory will always be in our hearts.
You shall never be forgotten.
Our hearts and souls are with you. 06
Funeral for my Grandma was yesterday. It was good and some unexpected people came which was extra nice. Still hard and unbelievable that she is no longer here on this earth, but she was so peaceful and now with her husband on to more wonderful journeys. Its going to be a really hard couple of weeks for my mom. Hopefully she will be ok.
So trying to figure out what’s going with wrong with me, I talked to my parents on what was going on and what I could try to balance myself back out. The talk to turned to me dying. I was informed I’m not allowed since they don’t have a headstone for me yet. And that if I do go there is an extra plot in Driggs. Oh and then my dad ask if they still have life insurance out on me and my mom said yes, So my dad was like at least the funeral would be paid for.
I’m going to do two flash backs next post. My stuff is upstairs and I’ve been hiding in bed since getting home. Too mentally and physically drained to do much but sleep today.
March 25, 2016 Tomorrow is the day I travel to go Logan for my grandma’s funeral. Probably won’t get back to this for a few days. A lot of driving and hoping not to get lost. Not so excited about this, but yet it must be done. And to add to it its snowing just a joy. Well not to much fun today just life at work 8 hours of the craziness of a Friday before Easter. And crazy it was. Large carts full of Easter fun, hundreds of dollars, weird we never had that big of to do during Easter. Then again we always were using our spring break to go on a trip somewhere, better memories then finding eggs. www.my.tupperware.com/rmoss
Well to the throw back: 9-15-99
Sitting here in English
Writing another page.
Nobody caring what is written.
Adventures and dreams filling the lines.
A new story created
But nobody cares.
A journey made by many
Made down a lonesome road.
A way of life forgotten.
Mysteries, Drama, Action
Fill the page.
A new beginning and unforgettable end.
A place of comfort.
A place of fear.
But who shall know who will
Care or not.
Another world destroyed by unbelievers.
Another hope lost.
But Nobody Cares.
The lightning strikes the treacherous sky. Thunder defended the stricken world. Rain pounded down on the dry, cracked earth. The world holed through the bent trees. Nobody dared to go out in the storm, for it only meant death by the hand of the gods. The people crouched in the darkest corners of their houses in fear. They knew that they had committed the greatest sin and now the gods angrily stricked back.
The skies turned from black to blood stricken red. The eyes of the tormentors lashed out at everything. Large hands reached out tearing off roof tops to get at the sinners. Nobody was safe.
Monsters and demons walked the land haunting the ones that tried to escape. Evil seeped out of every crack or hole.
Life March 24, 2016 So moving a little off from the normal. I’m going to wandering in another world. I’ve been cleaning the office finally going through boxes working on cleaning up and purging. If check out my ebay listings you’ll be able to find some. The rest if not just being trashed will go to friends for them to use. But I keep finding notebooks that are filled with about all kind of ramblings so I figure I’ll start putting some on line. LOL I maybe killed for some stuff that was written but I also think it maybe interesting reading.
Friendship is important to me, but not to the point that I would kill someone or get into a fight with them. I figure that if my friends has a problem they should take care of it themselves and I will be there to support them or back them up, but not take control of the situation myself and cause a bigger problem.
Time does fly when you wish it to but only if they heart is in the right place.
Magic is in you everyday and night. It only occurs when you call it out and cast it in good or evil.
Stand true to your dreams you never know when one will walk by you.
The gentle breeze slowly blows through your hair. The smell of the morning fills your senses. The sound of waves crashing below you pounds through the air. The music of nature brings a sympathy to life in front of you. A new awakening brightens the forsaken world. A rebirth of olden times when man runs along side of animals. When the time to kill was only to feed your young.
A slow moving bug creeps past you on a small brown stick. It whispers Good Morning in your ear and then parts before he is seen.
Running along a deep cavern barely making a noise. Trying to out run the enemy that closes in on you. your feet landing silently in the water that gentle rushes by.
So my goal this year is to get out of debt. Hence the reason of starting this blog, but also working on selling stuff on ebay and starting up an etsy shop. So far not so good at this. So if you do read this check out the other things and please share. Could use all the help I can get to reach my goal. Also if willing to help follow my twitter page (@crazyfungus), I post new ebay listings there every time I add new.
Grandma, hope your journey to heaven is gentle and peaceful. That the suffering will end and you’ll be back with your true love here soon. Hard to say good bye.
Each to their season. And each season must renew itself. A new day and new time. Our journey doesn’t end just because we leave this earth but continues in the next with our family and friends that have passed on before us. A new and bright tomorrow. Where we get to return home to be with our Heavenly Father and Great Brother. Farewell my beloved. I’ll see you in the next life.
I am not sure about a lot of things right now. Finally kind of know what’s going on but just sort of. My ultrasound found that my superficial vein in the right leg is not blocked but isn’t working right, meaning a ton of back flow. The one in my left leg is basically blocked all the way to my ankle. So in May the first time they can get me in they will do the right one. Seal off the bulging veins and the superficial one. And we are waiting on the left to clear up before we do that one.
So I took Miss Lady Elizabeth Smallwood to the vet. Clean bill of health except she is overweight. And now sports a new hair cut.
And then had lunch with Andiy. Then it was flat Sam and Wee Jamie fun with Evil Demon flowers.
So couldn’t picture to work last night so above was yesterday. Today I was called into work someone left abruptly, who knows. But I also had my interview for the fulltime cashier position. Ugh didn’t have much confidence going in about getting the job, have less after answering questions. I hate answering questions. Kind of like having a test and totally forgetting everything you know and have ever been taught. Rather good learning experience, but hope I never have to do again. (Waiting for my millions to come in).
So don’t have anything this week on stuff to check out. I’m actually purging down on stuff. Though I did join this group my friend Andiy is part of. She kept saying the family setting would help me. Maybe if I ever get brave and actually say something. Well another day and Another time.
Tomorrow hopefully is the day when I get answers. And a thought on what to do about my legs. Did an ultrasound on Friday. Wasn’t as long as I was thinking nor as bad. Flat Sam helped out as well and Andiy was there too. It was then a walk through the mall and then over to Panera Bread for dinner. Oh the fun part of that was basically an hour before my appointment I started my period. So not sure if I could take anything I layed there the whole time without having taken any pain meds. What a fun time.
Flat Sam causing problems at the gas station
Tomorrow is the last day of my three days that I’ve had to work at 11:15. Totally weird that I’ve had three days in a row with almost the same schedule. But its been nice that I’ve finally can wear compression socks again. It’s been very helpful on the legs as I’m standing for 8 hours each day.
So today’s thought is making money doing surveys are not what everyone says they are. I keep trying and yet still it takes me forever to make the min. withdraw amount. That unless you really have nothing to do but sit at your computer and take like a hundred of them, I really don’t find how you can actually make a living in just doing surveys. And remember don’t ever pay to join a survey thing. They are just making money off of you and not really helping you out in anyway. Actually most things you have to pay to join is just a scam to get your money. If they really wanted to help you out they’d just give you the information.
I’ve been trying my hand at ebay without much luck either. I mean I’ve sold stuff and have found that I actually can’t offer free shipping just don’t get the bids that would cover shipping. Still no luck on hitting it big, well just looking to get something that would help pay something off. I just don’t have the skill to sell anything. I mean I keep throwing out my Tupperware thing out but since I don’t do fairs or parties that just doesn’t do very well either. Thinking I may try etsy for my painted letters that I’ve done but not sure yet.
Well… Is really what’s on my mind right now. Still dealing with blood clots in the leg and then Sunday I tried to face plant it on the driveway. Ended up twisting my ankle and messing up my right leg. So both now are hurting. That and now I ice the right and have heat on the left, just to add to my already craziness. Can’t wear compression socks at work since I’m getting my veins mapped on Friday and as the doctor so nicely told “man, that’ll hurt”. Don’t like his bed side manners but I need to get this done. 33 Years old and I’m falling apart.
Well… I applied for the full time position that opened at work. Not sure I’ll get it but there’s only like 3 of us that applied for it so my odds are ok. Just rather stink at interviews. Though it would be nice to have a way more steady job then killing myself over trying to get hours and taking call ins. Though Stormy isn’t so thrilled that she may loose her call in go to person.
Well… This weeks might take a look at site is not really a make money thing. But if you like to shop online like me and get rewarded then you should try Ebates out. I’ve actually enjoyed it. Don’t get a ton of money now that I’m scraping pennies to get out of debt but still if I need something I go through them to get a little back. Also did a little updating on my ebay stuff in hopes to sell something, I actually suck at selling stuff but I keep thinking at least I’m making some effort to get money to get out of debt.